![]() ![]() If I ever find the doctor who screwed up my limb replacement surgery…I’ll kill him with my bear hands.What do you call a beehive without an exit? Unbelievable.My hotel tried to charge me ten dollars extra for air conditioning.Who were the greenest Presidents in US history? The bushes.In fact, if you sneer at any other method of measuring liquids, you may be held in contempt of quart.What do you call a line of men waiting to get haircuts? A barberqueue.In America, using the metric system can get you in legal trouble.Of all the inventions of the last 100 years, the dry erase board has to be the most remarkable.Where do pirates get their hooks? Second hand stores.I hate my job-all I do is crush cans all day.What's the difference between a well-dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly-dressed man on a bicycle? Attire. ![]() How do cows stay up to date? They read the Moo-spaper.I said, "I always have a few Twix up my sleeve." ![]()
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